"Never Say Never"

Carrie Bradshaw writes a blog. Why can't I? I have always loathed and been a bit jealous of Sarah Jessica Parker sporting the latest high fashion trend, killer stiletto, and hair that when it's bigger, it's better. I guess in some way I looked up to the fictional Sex and the City character for being brave enough to wear geometric prints and having the courage to write a newspaper column that expressed everything she loved, hated, wished, hoped for, and dreaded about NYC, Sex, Friends, and, of course, Men. In a sense, Carrie Bradshaw and I are a lot alike. I would choose 1 pair of the sweetest shoes over 10 blouses. I searched high and low for the best boyfriend contender, and finally found my 'Big' (except he's 'Little') after a long line of losers. And I write weekly about the things I find necessary, sometimes inappropriate, always connected to my life in some way. The difference though, is when I blog, when I write, I am doing it for my love of music.

I got my first writer's night invitation from the sweet Johanna Jacobsen, a fellow Nashville resident, a couple weeks ago. Thrilled isn't the word. I've been on the scene since July waiting for this opportunity. In Mississippi, (and other parts), they say, "Oh, hell.. you can sing? Get up here girl. Sing for us a couple hours, and I'll pay you $200 bucks to do it." Here? It's a privilege to even step on the stage, sing 5 songs for 30 minutes and have 7 people looking at you. Sometimes clapping. They are looking for the best. Well, I'm here to be the best, write the best, and sing the best. So when I was asked to play, I jumped at the opportunity, asked the 6 people I knew in town and waited a week until the big day. When it finally arrived I was ready, nothing could get in my way. The only problem was the only 'fans' I asked had a lot standing in their way. Work, school, and other social events prevented me from having ANY support whatsoever at my very first show. ever. in Nashville. Except for my Little, he is always there. But that's okay, I don't need anyone's help, I can do it on my own. I've always been independent, headstrong, don't-help-me-I-can-do-it-by-myself. But I had to admit, a few people there to cheer me on would have been icing on the big, fat cake I had in front of me. It was time to get ready. I turned Family Feud on and watched as the people cheered so loud for their family members no matter how dumb their answer was. Knock, Knock. I looked through the trusty peephole and Flowers!! My sweet family couldn't be there, but they remembered me. I felt a slight feeling of disappointment knowing they couldn't share this moment with me but it was quickly washed away with the hope for one day this was all going to pay off. After putting on the makeup and preparing for the night, Knock Knock. (What now? Who now?) As I opened the door I found the sweetest, most awesome present of all. Out of nowhere, my sister is standing solo on my front door step, jumping up and down in excitement, saying she just drove herself here. I cannot cry, I cannot cry, I cannot cry. My mascara looks fabulous. She is literally sprinting around the room, yelling, while I am crouched on the floor, holding back tears and for.. Knock. Knock. As I opened the door, I screamed so loud out of excitement that my mom had joined her! What an awesome surprise. I am now jumping up and down on my bed and the mascara will have to be reapplied. Knock. Knock. Again? My grandmother. Another series of knocks. My aunt. Knock. Another aunt. KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK. My cousin. How does this get any better? How? Seven of my closest family members drove 6 hours and SURPRISED me on the day of my first show. They wouldn't have missed it. I almost forgot about the dang gig because I was so pumped. But I fixed my hair Carrie-ish, slipped on my heels, got my guitar, showed up at Music Row Bar & Grill and we rocked it. Not just me, all of the writers did awesome. And I had a cheering section all my own. All mine. I was so proud to be seen with such a beautiful group of women and knowing the whole time how much they love and support me. It sure does make this process a lot easier. I have the most wonderful, fun, awesome family ever. That's having a lot, even if you ain't got nothin'.

So the place that I call home now is Nashville. I will continue singing, writing, and working on my dream until it happens. Like Rev Run says, "Success is like being a stamp. Stick to it until you reach where you are going." I know that gig was the first of many, but it was special. On my 13th birthday at Pizza Inn, I got 3 tickets in a box to see Reba McEntire. That moment and this one are on the top of my list for the 'Best Days Of My Life' Category. Now, let's see if we can't get into other categories like 'Female Vocalist', 'Breakthrough Artist', 'Entertainer of the Year for the Whole Planet'. I'll take any or all of the above. And if Kanye interrupts me, he will get smacked.

My life is a roller coaster. My life is up. My life is down. My life is unfolding right in front of me. Maybe it should be called "Singing and the City"...... Music City, that is.

xo, Meagan Rae